just a suggestion, but
relax about right and wrong
good and bad
drinking beer
because i want to
so delicious
so relaxing
then having a bit too much
woozy
switching to tea
ice tea
with cream in it
i've been doing this for so many years
if you ask me, that's a kind of success
living on the edge of being OK
i don't feel i have much choice
which is also OK
i feel more in control than a lot of people
including some who are ever so respectable
they stupidly died
i remain alive
now and then
it catches up to me
i feel like i'm dying
horrible! horrible!!!
throwing up
then throwing up again
it's not enough
hanging my head in the tub
gulping water
so extremely sweet!
even though i'm dying
washing my head with cold water
moaning
crying
moaning and crying loudly
(can the neighbors hear me?
and i've don this before)
Jesus ... this is when i pray to him
and the throwing up very deeply
amazing
and then i can sleep
you've just got to deal with stuff
when you can't any longer
i guess you die
must be a relief
or might be, i guess
if you're in pain
the guy was widely acknowledged to be a saint
and a master
and he was a master, within his domain
it was great
and he was also sort of a saint
when he got the diagnosis
i told him not to listen to those fools
hoping he would listen to me
but he did think me a fool
and said "a very wise man once said ..."
and then he was dead
one day
i too will die
i've decide
and i won't say i know when
white light
but i've survived a few episodes
